Saturday, August 30, 2008

Tests Flame Gold

Lastnight was hard such a hard attack seems like it came out of nowhere...i dont know whats up with these episodes...but they are happening to often...luckily i had my amazing friends there with me online being encouragement...i read some Promises and that seemed to help...i have to start being more equipped if im more equipped i'll be less vulnerable in was ard i was supposed to have a Group Bible study with my friends but we had to reschedule so i was ok with that we are reading 1 Peter...i went to 125th street to get some school supplies only to discover that i only had $1.00 in the bank i was crushed but i prayed...i prayed and i refused to let doubt interfere...i went to Staples and picked up a couple of things and put them was alittle too i left Staples and walked to the 10 bus because i had a bus transfer...when i got to the bus stop or close to it rather the bus had already pulled off i thought i misses it that kinda sucked..i continued singing Worship songs...songs to remind me of how Awesome God set my focus on Him and not my circumstance...and i got home and told my mom about my day and she gave me some money and we went to Staples and i got my supplies...she came into some money today so that was great! as of right now i feel good about today but i feel kinda....i cant even describe...perhaps im get the title right? i hope ....1 Peter 1:7

Monday, August 25, 2008

Time, Time and Time Again

How you spend your time is very important because a lot of things require time, finances, friendships, fun, serious things, family, just to name a few. Its very important to stop the habit of relaxing and slacking off after a spiritual high. I'm guilty of doing this so many times but im so glad that the Holy Spirit keeps after me reminding me although i have to admit i am hardheaded at times ok maybe a have to learn balance i need to pray that i learn balance i need to learn how to include God in the things i do and not separate them. I believe what it is is although these things are important to me i don't feel they are important enough for me to go to God about unless i'm trying to put some truth or Gospel in it. (things = videos, video stuff) i have been up for the most part but today i was down not too much but enough for me to notice how i have been spending my time and how i need to re prioritize and not slack off after a spiritual high.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Sisters computer issues

so yea my sis is having comp issues hopefully these photos can help you solve the last part of the issue!!!

Food,Fun, and Sillyness

You know sometimes just sometimes i think that maybe I'm too silly and random at times to be a Youth Minister but then I'm reminded that i don't need to be boo yah enemy!!!God Holds me!!!

SO yea whew yesterday was amazing. I caught a Matinee in BK saw that ummm batman movie ummm..The Dark Knight. The craziest happened like half way into the movie the lights cut on and then when the credits started rolling the lights were on again it sucked....So yea who was i with i was with Avery,Dawn, and Greg as well as occasionally Althea. SO we pretty much hung from 1 til after 10.

After the movies we went to 42nd where we walked to the Pier..afterward we went to the park played some ball, swung on the swings and played on the set. And After that we walked to the chocolate stores, and visited Sam Ash, and Toysrus played kickball in the store hulla hooped...give or take some more events along the way yesterday was amazing full of food fun and community silliness.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Struggle & Strength

Listening to: Shout Unto God by Hillsong United Look to You

Struggle & Strength:
My greatest struggle seems to come from my home, no support for my aspirations and blatant disregard for my feelings. Its been hard dealing with this my whole life, what makes it even harder is that its one person who my whole life i have looked up to but its like all i feel is anger aimed at me. I've lived my whole life trying to please her and now that I'm finally taking this route which has taken a lot of evaluation and prayer and trusting in God, still daggers are coming. This isn't new at all this has been my desire for a number of years. In my strength when i try on my own i always fail. Every time i decide to give up and leave it in God's Hands He just gives me this amazing peace and i see Him working in my situation.

My prayer is that God would continue to lead me down a path that gives Him the Ultimate Glory that He would help me to live a life that is pleasing in His sight and that in my weakness He will make me strong with His Strength and work through me.

This big step is still scary.

Ordinary Me Continued

There were some things i forgot to mention in my blog and i felt it is appropriate to put them up here. So when you are trying something difficult, or hard its important to have an accountability partner, for support to be there alongside you praying with and for you. Well God has blessed me with two amazing women in my life this season for a reason. Dawn and Sharlene all i can say is Wow. Amazing women they were checking on me making sure my 5 day retreat, and reconnection with God was being followed, that i was making the most of the day and that i was on track. Talking with me about any struggles i had during the day, offering advice and just being there. So its important to have great amazing friends who you can grow with, share struggles with, count on, and pour into.

This morning i read Romans 6. Later on i will tell you how that worked in my day, how God helped me to apply it to my life.
Well right now i have to get ready for work its only 3 hours but an an amazing 3 hours.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Ordinary Me

God has done some extraordinary mind blowing things in my simple life. I just want to spill everything out but then i would be here all night typing so how about i just put in a nutshell for now as much as possible. The beginning of this week started with some struggle. I was upset because some friends i used to be very close to until you know people move on they are either in your life for a season or a lifetime. Well they were in my life for a wonderful couple of seasons they are mentioned in my last blog account. Oh yea i ramble by the way just a heads up and i jump subjects. SO anyway I was upset because something amazing happened in their life and i wasn't included in the loop i mean how could i if I'm not in their life, clearly but still i was hurt. So along with that i was dealing with pressure about the decision to go back to school and finally pursing what i feel God has set on my heart since i was younger. And dealing with bills and not being employed right now. It was just overwhelming, i hadn't been setting time for Quiet Time, Prayer, or even Bible Study. I was too busy youtubing and myspacing, little telltale signs were popping up giving me hints on my condition before it went bursting forth. Luckily my cousin Tirrell as online to hear me out and offer me some amazing Truth, i knew these truths you know God is Faithful and bigger than my issues but i just wanted to vent you know. Well the Spirit laid it upon my heart that i needed to do a reality check, a retreat away from the distractions getting back into whats important and that is my relationship with the Lord. I was getting too busy with those other things that i had my priorities all jacked up and God wanted to remind me about the importance of His time, my time and restoring balance in my life.

Those bills that i was worried about God put it to the side! God is an Awesome God! God is Bigger than my issues. If i ask Him, He will Provide!

This week has been amazing! God has restored me, He has given me renewed hope and He has replaced my worry with unspeakable joy. And He has showered me with His Love. He has been here right with me!

Quick Info

Quick post: my last blogger journal can be found here just in case you want to read some background info!